Random sayings of the day

ive got both good news and bad news, the good news is that there is no bad news.

I like gunz :3

if you shoot yourself with a feather and fall,

Like i said on facebook you'll splat like one too.

Can you imagine the mess.

When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle - they're on TV!

Vampires are make believe, like elves, gremlins, and Eskimos.

Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You/re making a scene'.

Don't let Krusty's death get you down, boy. People die all the time, just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow! Well, good night!

You know boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like women. You just have to read the manual and press the right button.

Now what is a wedding? Well, Webster's dictionary describes a wedding as the process of removing weeds from one's garden.

Books are useless: I only ever read one book, "To Kill A Mockingbird" - and it gave me absolutely no insight on how to kill mockingbirds! Sure it taught me not to judge a man by the color of his skin, but what good does THAT do me?

"I want to share something with you - the three sentences that will get you through life. Number one, 'cover for me. 'Number two, 'oh, good idea, boss. 'Number three, 'it was like that when I got here."

If you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now, quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers!

You know boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like women. You just have to read the manual and press the right button.


Way too sexist.

whether you consider the glass half full or half empty isnt important. what is important, however, is that you finish your drink.

hm ...that make sense? o_o

Women are like telephones. They love to be held and talked to. God forbid you push the wrong button...or you'll be disconnected =D

whoever decided to name the orange (fruit) was really uncreative

XD

o.o

If you notice this notice, you'll notice theres nothing to notice with this notice... DID YA NOTICE THAT ?

what?

yesterday i tried to fly by jumping off a roof of a house and flapping my arms....... and it worked!

psh i did that yesterday...then i got hit by a plane. I don't exist anym-

if you wear a thong to a mall and youre a guy youre girlfriend will look at you funny

@ me: lol
@ zetsumei: lol

Whatev. My girlfriend thinks i'm smexy when i do that

havent been on in a while cause my sis wont let me on her comp

if bananas had wings monkeys would have to learn to drive airplanes

im going to fill a room with 309 miniature lighthouse figurines

- woops I accidently typed instead of . Now it's awkward.
No it wasn't awkward until you said it was awkward, >.> now it's awkward! O.o

- ....MOOO....MOOOOOO!! x3

- when I'm bored I just watch raindrops race eachother down a car window xD
-life isn't a garden so stop bein a hoe.

*insert random saying here*

*inserts a random saying there*

thank you

- 911, WTF's wrong wit chu ?!

baha , . (:

no problemo mi amigo. Tu tienes mucho hablar por nada

holly: lol nice

There are 3 types of people in this world 1 type is good at math and 1 type is bad at math.

This world is full of cool people so what does that make u?